Hatred for Helplessness.

i stand and watch you fall from afar
though not very
wishing i could fix it all
watching you, it scares me
i wonder if this is my fault
if i've caused this downward spiral
of despair that has you caught
and will not let you go

they tell me that you're going crazy
drinking more than in times past
that your minds a little hazy
how long will this madness last
soon you will be empty
left with no one to carry
the burdens that you placed on me
and then took back unwillingly

it hurts to see you like this
it hurts even more
to think of the bliss
that could have been ours
if things had been different
and now i watch
as you slip under
once again

if i could take away your pain
i would, i wish you'd see
that all the sorrow you are holding
rightfully belongs to me

so look up
stop drowning in your sorrows
look around
it's a new day
filled with people who would care
if you weren't pushing them away
reach out
try life for a change
stop hiding
behind your lack of personality
and see that the only one you never let go of
is me.

Autumnal reflections.

"Delicious autumn!  My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns." 
--George Eliot

Ah...the very beginnings of autumn are creeping in and overtaking the remnants of summer that stubbornly holds on here in the upstate. It's beautiful. Stunning. Breathtaking.

I walk around, soaking it all in, trying to maintain this feeling of awe and wonder that the change of seasons always brings me. It's inspiring. It's poetic. It's...lovely.

As for the inspiring and poetic part...I'm working on a few new things now. They'll be up whenever I'm satisfied with them. This is just a teaser to get you looking forward to them C:

Poetic Ramblings.

A few old poems I wrote...I decided to dust them off as the grand opening of this blog :) Some of them were on facebook, some...no one has seen before :0

The Promise
A sentence of breathtaking hope
A lens that colours the future
A statement which brings certain scope
A definitive question with uncertain answer

A way to look past what is now
Into a season to come
A glimpse that leaves us asking how
To attain such a glorious sum

But is it within our power
To exclude these hindering steps
Which cause us to stumble and glower?
Nay, they are the reason we continue

For without certain struggles and hardships
The product should not be as pleasing
And so these words shall dance from my lips
"Leave behind this, and press toward the promise.
(8.22.08)

Ignorant Passion
Oh, the fateful leap
of youthful good intentions
Hindsight offers much
in areas as these
The eager spoken
hungrily recieved words
which ignite such ignorant passions
I charge you
do not arouse or awaken love
until it so desires.
(8.25.08)

is there yet one?
perverted world
twisted life
could it be
that purity
was once an esteemed thing?
for the very thought
so often admired
in ages past
is now despised
and is there yet one
waiting for me?
(8.08)

Joy
Is there pleasure,
Or is there joy,
That can compare to mine?
For what I have
Most tortured souls
Would search the world to find.
On the whole earth
A greater happiness
Not a single man can find
And what could be the source
Of greater exuberance
Then to know
And be known
By another.
(9.08)

dead end day
alive.
awake.
breathing.
moving without intention.
walking and going nowhere

dead.
asleep.
suffocating.
living without life.
staring and seeing nothing

life has become a dead end.
(9.11.08)

A Penny For Thy Thoughts
What lies behind thine eyes?
Those sparkling pools of endless light
That can both dance with laughter
And show thy true sadness

What thoughts precede each sound?
Uttered from thy mouth
Which can shout with purest joy
Or speak of lonely sorrow

Oh, to know thy mind
Without waiting for expressions
Oh, to know thy thoughts
Without waiting for thy words

But doth even the subject
E’er truly know
The notion in mind
Without saying aloud?
And do even thou know
What thou will say
Before the words dance
Off thy tongue?
(9.08)

Untitled
My downcast face
Has shed a tear
Today for anothers woe
and its my prayer
the other shall
never come to know
what done today in secret
but shall be brought to light
because of things
I know she does that keep me up at night

The marks of sorrow
which do marr
the heart and skin external
Cannot express the inner pain
that rages in her soul
With each cut
She silences
a voice she will not use
Is there any hearing ear
to stay this continuing abuse?

This inner battle
does rage on
in body and in soul
I look on helpless
Wishing she
would just let someone know
But wish no longer
For I have
forsaken my last promise
Will good come
or trouble ensue
from this broken confidence?
(9.08)